Overcome Nice Guy Shame
“No More Mr. Nice Guy” Story 2 of 25
In this powerful video, as your Happy Man Coach, I share a personal story about getting lost in a supermarket as a child and the lasting impact of fear, shame, and the desire to please others.
This story is not just a journey through past experiences but a roadmap to understanding how these feelings have shaped our self-perception and behaviors.
Picture this: I'm a young boy, maybe around six years old, wandering through the aisles of a Piggly Wiggly supermarket. If you haven't heard of Piggly Wiggly, it's a small-town grocery store that was quite common back in the day. My mom and I lived in one of those small towns, and grocery shopping was a weekly ritual.
One particular day, my curiosity got the better of me. You know how kids are, right? Distracted by every shiny object, every colorful display. While my mom was busy scrutinizing labels and prices, I somehow drifted into the next aisle, completely oblivious to the fact that I was straying too far.
Before I knew it, I was lost. Panic set in almost immediately. I remember the overwhelming fear and shame washing over me like a tidal wave. I felt like I had done something terribly wrong. My mind raced with thoughts of disapproval and disappointment from my mom. I could almost hear her voice in my head, telling me I had messed up again.
After what felt like an eternity, I heard my name over the store's intercom. "Charlie McKeever, please come to the front of the store." The voice echoed through the aisles, and my heart sank. I knew I was in trouble.
When I finally made my way to the front, there stood my mom, flanked by the store manager. Her face was a mix of relief, frustration, and embarrassment. She was angry, disappointed, and most of all, embarrassed that she had to resort to calling me over the intercom. She made sure to let me know just how much I had embarrassed her, driving home the point that I needed to stick by her side and not wander off.
In that moment, the fear and shame I felt were almost unbearable. It wasn't just about being lost; it was about the underlying message that I had failed to meet expectations. I felt like I needed to be perfect, to always please others, to avoid mistakes at all costs. The fear of doing something wrong, of making a mistake, became a constant companion in my young life.
Can you relate to that? Are you ever concerned about what others think of you? Do you fear making mistakes? Do you carry around feelings of shame, anxiety, and uncertainty? If so, you're not alone. Many of us grapple with these emotions, often stemming from experiences much like mine.
But here's the good news: we can break free from these chains. For me, the journey to freedom started with understanding that my mom was doing the best she could. She wasn't a villain; she was a parent navigating her own fears and frustrations. As a parent myself now, I see how easy it is to make mistakes, to act out of fear or frustration.
Recognizing that she did her best allowed me to shift my perspective. I stopped seeing myself as a victim and started seeing myself as the hero of my own story. This shift was transformative. It helped me challenge the self-limiting beliefs I had formed as a child—beliefs that told me I had to be perfect, that I had to please others to be worthy of love and acceptance.
These beliefs are like operating instructions we've built over time. They tell us what we can and can't do, who we need to be to feel safe and accepted. But we don't have to be bound by these rules. We can rewrite them.
I invite you to join me on this journey of self-discovery and transformation. Let's walk and talk about your experiences, your fears, and your shame. Let's challenge those self-limiting beliefs together and find new, empowering ways to live.
You don't have to carry the weight of fear and shame alone. If this resonates with you, let's set up a call. There's a link in the description where you can choose a day and time that works for you.
Ready to change your life and your marriage?
Then take the next logical step.
SCHEDULE A "FREEDOM FROM" COACHING CALL
Schedule a free coaching call with me to share your story and discuss what you'd like be different in your relationships and life.
START THE NICE GUY STUDY COURSE
Take my Happy Man Coaching No More Mr. Nice Guy Course
The course includes private one-on-one coaching calls to help you understand the key concepts covered in the book, along with other important related concepts NOT covered in the No More Mr. Nice Guy book.
Until we talk again, be kind to yourself.
Much love, brother,
Charlie McKeever
Your Happy Man Coach
HappyManCoaching.com
"The very best thing you can do for the whole world is to make the most of yourself." – Wallace D. Wattles, 1903
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